Why You Should not be an Overprotective Parent
02-12-2016 | Posted By: Admin | 1949 View(s)
Parenting is one of the toughest jobs for all the parents and being an overprotective parent can be a drag on the child. If anything is lacking in parenting, the child tends to become a spoilt one. Earlier, the major issue was under-parenting. The kids were the victims of negligence and inappropriate behaviour by their parents. But later on, over parenting became another hot topic. These days, the parents are overprotective and over-possessive about their kids which lead them to do things in confinement.
Continuous strict behaviour with the children, not allowing them to do anything on their own, forcing them to do something which they don’t want to do, are some of the signs of over parenting. Strict behaviour and consciousness may ruin the child even more. They tend to become more stubborn with a wrong and unhealthy personality.
Being an overprotective parent is nothing new; it has been there for decades. To build up a good career for their offspring, the parents tend to do those things which they should not, without knowing the consequences. To get a luxurious life for their children, the parents ruin their lives unknowingly.
During the earlier decades, the parenting measures were more subjective and what mattered to the parents as their child’s happiness. But as the time is changing, parenting is also changing. These days, the things that matter the most to the parents are that if their children are performing well in studies or not and materialistic things come first, and the happiness of the child later.
Ways to find out if you are an Overprotective Parent:
• Many times we see that children go to their parents for every small problem, be it school issue, tiffin issue, siblings issue, etc. If parents get involved in all these petty things their children face, it means that they are overprotective.
• If parents are accompanying their child every time wherever they go, and there is too much parental involvement in the child’s activities means that the parents are overprotective.
• Over protective parents tend to take all the responsibility on their shoulder of their childlike waking him up, getting him dressed up, feeding him, and all such things which a child is capable of doing on his own.
• If the parents always safeguard their child from every danger and feeling of discomfort or discourage them from taking any risk means that the parents are overprotective.
• Many parents are extremely sympathetic to their children. If they go to an extreme level to provide support when their child is sad, angry or anxious, means that they are adopting styles of an overprotective parent.
• Frequent contact with teachers, mentors to deal with minor issues of the child is also a sign of overprotective parents.
• The real world is a combination of both good and evil things. Some parents tend to make a guarding shell around their children thinking they can protect them from every danger and fail to teach their children about the real world, which is also a sign of being overprotective
• Some parents cater to every wish and desire of their child. If your child’s demands are always taken care of at top priority, it means you are overprotective for your child.
• When parents start taking control of their child’s social lives and tell them who to maintain friendship and who to avoid, it is a sign that parents are overprotective for their child.
Ways to stop being an Over-Protective parent
• Encourage your child to solve their issues on their own. It does not mean that parents should just leave their child in their stressful situations, but should guide in a way that they learn how to deal with small issues on their own and become independent.
• Support your child in taking risks and encourage them to accept failures in life and move on.
• Don’t get too much involved in your child’s activities like accompanying them every time they go for outdoor games or while doing some non-gas cooking or tying up the lace of his shoes. Too much parental involvement in whatever they do and where ever they go will make them more dependent.
• Parents should not constantly keep track of their child’s activities, and they should be given enough emotional and physical space to do things on their own without any nagging from the parent. There is nothing wrong in not attending to your child occasionally as it can prove beneficial for the kids only.
• Fulfil only those demands and wishes of your child that are necessary. Don’t give in to every wish of your child as they will then become more stubborn and materialistic.
• Have faith in your child and don’t think that they are incapable of taking decisions. Keep an eye on their social circle, but don’t discourage them from maintaining a friendship with people unnecessarily only because it’s making you feel uncomfortable.
• Teach your child about the norms of society and allow them to meet everyone without any discrimination. Even if the parent comes from a small family, the kid should be raised up with a big family mindset.
• Keep in touch with the teachers and the mentors of your child but not so regular that your child feels that he is checked for each and everything and does not feel as if you are an overprotective Parent
• Increase their awareness of the real world which is full of bad things also. Don’t make them fantasise that the world is a beautiful place to live, rather give them knowledge and support so that they can face tough situations on their own.
By following these simple ways, one can avoid being an over-protective parent. Under-parenting may spoil the child but at the same time, overparenting can also have a similar consequence. So, while bringing up a child, the right kind of parenting style must be adopted to make him a good human being with an upright personality rather than keep on shielding the child by being an overprotective Parent
